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Adams Stirling PLC
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'TWAS THE NIGHT BEFORE CHRISTMAS

In an effort to minimize potential liability and calm homeowners' concerns, the following report is submitted by the Association's legal counsel.

Whereas, on or about the night prior to Christmas, there occurred at a certain condominium (hereinafter "Unit" with identifying numbers redacted for privacy purposes) a general lack of stirring by creatures therein, including, but not limited to a mouse (an issue under review with the Association's pest control company). Socks had been affixed around the chimney in the hope that St. Nick aka Santa Claus ("Claus") would arrive sometime thereafter. The Board asked our firm if the hanging of socks was a violation of the governing documents. After extensive review by one of our associate attorneys, it was determined that no violations occurred. The CC&Rs and Condo Plan identify the mantle as part of the Unit. As such, owners are allowed to decorate their mantles.

Occupancy Restrictions. The minor residents, i.e. children residing at the aforementioned Unit in conformance with the Association's occupancy restrictions, (which allow no more than two residents per bedroom and one for the unit i.e., the 2 + 1 rule), were in their beds and engaged in dreams of candies, nuts and/or sugar plums (also not a violation of any Association rules). According to declarations submitted by the owners of the Unit, members in good standing, they too retired to their beds.

Security Incident. Suddenly, and without prior notice or warning, there occurred a disruption in the common areas. One of the aforementioned residents immediately rushed to a window to investigate the cause of the commotion. Whereupon was observed, with some degree of wonder and/or disbelief, an unregistered sleigh being pulled through the air by approximately eight (8) undocumented reindeer, having breached security by failing to stop at the guard station at the front gate. (The Board is reviewing possible changes to security procedures to avoid such incidents in the future.) The unlicensed driver of the nonconforming vehicle appeared to be the previously referenced Claus.

Co-Conspirators. Said Claus was giving direction to the reindeer and specifically identified the animal co-conspirators as: Dasher, Dancer, Prancer, Vixen, Comet, Cupid, Donder and Blitzen (hereinafter the "Deer"). Upon information and belief, it is further asserted that an additional co-conspirator named Rudolph may have been involved. The Association's management company is checking its records to see if it has any contact information for Claus and his accomplices.

Rules Infraction. According to members who witnessed the incident, the vehicle and Deer trespassed upon the common area roofs without Board permission and in clear violation of the Rules & Regulations. Because of possible insurance implications, the Association's insurance carrier was notified. The potentially unsafe vehicle was filled with what appeared to be items of unknown origin or nature. Suddenly, without prior invitation or permission, either express or implied, the vehicle arrived at the Unit, and Claus entered via the exclusive use chimney in further violation of rules requiring all guests use front doors only.

CC&R Violation. The aforementioned unauthorized guest was clad in a red suit and carried a large sack containing toys, together with other unknown items. Claus was smoking tobacco in a small pipe in clear violation of a recent CC&R amendment against smoking in Units. (The smoking ban is currently under legal challenge by a chain-smoking couple who believe they should have been grandfathered. The unbudgeted legal fees created by the litigation may result in an emergency special assessment after the first of the year. A copy of the complaint is available for review in the management office.)

Hardwood Floors. The boots worn by Claus also made excessive noise on the hardwood floors and woke the owners in the unit below--a matter scheduled for discussion at the next board meeting to determine if acoustical standards should be raised for future hard-surfaced floor installations. Members are invited to express their opinions on this important issue during the Open Forum portion of the meeting. An agenda will be posted on bulletin boards at least four days prior to the meeting.

Nonprofit Status. Claus immediately filled the stockings of the aforementioned minor children with toys and other small gifts. (Out of an abundance of caution, we asked a CPA to determine if the gifts jeopardize the Association's nonprofit status.) Upon completion of the task, Claus touched the side of his nose and flew up the chimney to the roof where the Deer waited as lookouts beside the overloaded sleigh. (The Maintenance Committee will meet with a roofing contractor to examine the roof for potential damage. If any is found, the unit owner visited by Claus may be specially assessed for the damage.)

Claus quickly departed for an unknown destination. However, prior to his departure Claus was heard to exclaim: "Merry Christmas to all and to all a good night!" Or words to that effect.


  Very truly yours,
 
   Adrian Adams, Esq.
   ADAMS | STIRLING PLC

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